Where strange fact and stranger fiction collide
I am the last guy you should take love or romance advice from. I don’t get love, it is like a mathematical problem that I just can’t solve. Maybe it is because I treat love like a math problem is the reason that I am so bad at it.
A couple days ago was Valentine’s Day. Not having a significant other or a +1 in my life, I of course picked up an elven hour shift at work. When people at work asked me weather or not I was doing anything for Valentine’s Day, I replied “I refuse to celebrate anything that Pope Pious VI removed from the liturgical colander.” No, I am not Catholic, I just like using the word liturgical at work. And well it is easier to say than, I am disillusioned grumpy lonely middle-aged man.
So if I don’t know love what do I know? Star Wars. So in a flash of brilliance I decided to combine the two. And I came up with the Top Ten Dating Hints from Star Wars: A New Hope. The funny thing is it doesn’t take too much imagination to find at least one of these ‘hints’ that probably applies to your very own love life.
So good luck and may the Force be with you.
Oh and the management here at Dave’s Corner of the Universe is not to be held responsible if using any of these hints, leads to heartache, misery or sleeping on the couch.
10) “… You came in here and you didn’t have a plan for getting out?”
9) “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”
8) “I’ve got a very bad feeling about this.”
7) “I suggest a new strategy, R2. Let the wookiee win.”
6) “Look, good against remotes is one thing, good against the living, that’s something else.”
5) “Watch your mouth kid or you will find yourself floating home.”
4) “Boring conversation anyway. Luke, we’re gonna have company!”
3) “These are not the droids you’re looking for.”
2) “Trust in your feelings.”
1) “…Don’t get Cocky.”